Caught in the snowstorm with nowhere to go.

Have you ever been so mad at your child, you lock YOURSELF in a room?

That’s where I was on Wednesday.

I had been at work for an hour already, when my cell phone went off. I didn’t recognize the number, so I ignored it. (I don’t answer phone calls that I don’t know what the number is, I don’t really listen to voicemails other than to get rid of the icon on my phone, and I don’t friend accept people on Facebook I don’t know, so if you “friend” me, then please include a little message that you read my blog or I will reject you.)

So anyway, whoever it was kept calling, and I guess my “mommy radar” must have gone off, because when I answered it, this woman was like, “Do you have a son named Taylor?” At this point, I did the roll of the eyes, “Oh SHIT, WHAT NOW.” Then she proceeded to tell me she had found my son, out walking around the neighborhood IN A BLIZZARD, crying, so she let him come in to call me. I got her address, and after letting my boss know that I was going to strangle my child, I went over and picked him up.

I got him home and I guess he could tell by the steam that was shooting out of my ears, that I was pretty mad. So he started explaining that he had gone back to the house from the bus stop to get his backpack and the bus came. He didn’t have his house key, nor his cell phone on him…so instead of going directly to our neighbor, he decides to walk around the neighborhood to try to find Gavin’s best friends’ house. FOR AN HOUR.The thing is, he has missed the bus several times this year because of going back to the house for things. But we only live twenty feet from the bus stop, so I don’t know how he doesn’t see the bus coming?!!

I just ended up taking him home instead of school, because it was snowing so good that I had a feeling school would be canceled, and it would be a waste of an hour if I drove him all the way out there. Thankfully, they did cancel school about an hour later.

My question is…why can’t we pay to get our kids micro-chipped? I mean, then we could go online and track them when they are playing outside, that our teenagers are where they say they are, and if they were kidnapped, we would know where they were! We could even hook it up to Foursquare, so they could check in along the way. “Taylor has checked in to XYZ Middle School”

This is why I made Andy get a vasectomy.



Shameless Begging About to Commence: I was nominated on Babble's Top 50 Mom Blogs List. So can you please take two minutes and click here: http://www.babble.com/babble-50/mommy-bloggers/nominate-a-blogger/index.aspx then scroll down to "Glamorous Life" (on the second page) and click on the "like" button.

Let me tell you why I hate Halloween...

The Offenders

It's not so much the candy part. Any holiday that involves eating, I am generally in favor of. But with Halloween, it comes with stipulations. And I am usually skeptical of anything that requires action on my part.

When you have children, they want to trick or treat. I enjoyed this as a child, carrying my sacks of candy home, munching happily along the way. Until I DID get home, and my parents confiscated it to search for razor blades in apples and suspicious tampering of wrappers. I don't think I ever met anyone that found an actual razor blade in a piece of fruit, but this was the guise my parents operated under. The next day, the candy had vanished in to a lazy susan, which was transported by armored car to my fathers work....never to be seen or heard from again.

When I had kids, the costumes became more expensive and the quality of loot went waaaayyy down. It becomes an annual fight to even choose a costume. After we spend an entire weekend looking at Walmart, Target, the PX and finally landing at the over-priced seasonal costume store...looking at EVERY single costume...Just when I am about to keel over from exhaustion...my sons choose the same costume:

Last year, the little hooligans got me by telling me that their friend's mom wanted me to go with her to take the boys trick or treating. So I showed up at the house, where she told me it was wonderful that I said I would take HER THREE children trick or treating so she could stay at home and hand out candy!!! So I was stuck alone, taking 5 children around the neighborhood while she stayed in her toasty house. I bet she ate all the candy herself after we left. Kicked back with a glass of wine, and enjoyed the quiet.

Thats what I would've done.

So this year, we have bribed the kids to go have dinner and ice cream at Friendly's, or as I call it "BFF Friendly's." No trick or treating. Don't come to my house! "Keep on knockin', but you can't come in!"