Tuesday, September 11, 2012

"Is this thing on?" (tap, tap...)

So, I know you are there. You're lurking in the misty woods, like a Cullen, waiting to read whatever drivel I put out.

I see the stats.

Yet, but for a few of you, you remain silent. No comments.

I like comments. They validate me as a writer, since I have such low self-esteem. (HA!) But I do really like comments because I know you are looking in at me, but it's like a mirror and I can't see any of you. Maybe you're a Craigslist killer in wait. Maybe you're someone I admire.
(Actually, even if you're a Craigslist killer and you read my blog, I admire you for that. You can't be all that bad.)

So, uh, speak up a little bit.

Now that THAT item is addressed...

WTF is the deal with the RHONY? Or, for those of you who don't get acronyms, The Real Housewives of New York. (Yes, I watch that show. STOP LAUGHING AT ME!)

I am in girl-love with Carole and Heather. I have a sick feeling in my gut that neither one of them will come back next season, because they're too smart, and not "white trash", as Ramona Singer actually had to google on last night's episode. Any time I actually like someone on one of these shows, they leave because they aren't dramatic enough. But this time, they got the balance right. I am on the fence with Aviva. All I can say regarding her, is that I would GLADLY sacrifice a leg to have her body.

Prosthetics are amazing these days.

On yet ANOTHER note...

My husband, Andy, has been trying to barter bullshit items on Craigslist to trade up to a boat to work on, and ultimately, use. Well, it finally paid off. He traded a Pelican case and a pile of old army uniforms for a 1970's Ford truck that needs to be fixed up.

The man has a project. Thank FUCKING God, because I get unnerved every time I go anywhere in the house during the day when I am working, and there he is...lurking like Chuck Norris in wait. It's like that Bing Crosby movie, "White Christmas", when he sings, "What do you do with a General, when he stops being a General..."

I bet 3 of you even know what I am referring to, because it was a musical, done in technicolor, and poor Bing is dead. So is Rosemary Clooney. Sigh. The greats....

The problem is..this truck has to be towed here, because it needs a bunch of crap done to make it run. And my husband thinks that because the guy is giving him all the parts that need to be put in it, that he can just google how to do everything.

This is not a mechanically inclined man. Give him a sniper rifle, and he's all over it, and can teach you how to shoot a mile away, calculating the curvature of the Earth...but something breaks down, and all hell breaks loose.

This is going to be interesting to watch. Stay tuned...


  1. I never miss one of your posts. You are a talented writer who has lots to say, stuff that needs to be heard. Someday you'll write a best seller.

    I want to hear about the adventures your husband has as he trades up to a boat. Fascinating.

    If my husband didn't have a boat, we'd both be bonkers.

  2. such a good qoute from an EXCELLENT movie that goes perfect with Andy's situation!

    Even better - picturing him lurking around like Chuck Norris! Hehe..

    I was wondering what the adventures of Andy were like these days!

    Of course we're all hear - listening!! Love you!

  3. I read at least one of your blogs everyday. I love you because you are a hoot, have incredible insight and are funny!! and.....stay tuned

    I am one of your blog stalker fans :)

  4. I feel the same way....is anybody out there!??
    Sometimes it feels weird seeing big stats but never seeing comments..
    Keep writing!! ( i will too)

  5. Great post. I totally understand how it feels to have your husband basically appear out of nowhere. Mine was off last week and went back this week. Thank God. These side projects scare me when he finds one. But I am sure it will all work out.