Not a “ho” in the traditional sense.
I am not implying she is any more morally loose than the rest of us. Let’s be honest, I would probably have slept with every one she did, with the exception of Taylor Lautner, because he looks like my son Taylor….and he’s like 15 years younger than me, but that’s besides the point.
I really do not like this girl. Although I am not a fan of country music, or sugary-blond teen idols, it has nothing to do with her singing. She’s a fair singer. Better than Enrique Iglesias, which I can’t even figure out how he got a signing contract, but not as good as Mariah. I was probably the only asshole laughing when Kanye West cut her off at the Grammys. (I don’t really like him either, but it’s because he is a preppie college boy, not a true street thug. I’m going for realism here, people. )
Part of why I don’t like her is that she is fake as shit. She is no country bumpkin…NOOOOOOO way. In fact, she grew up with every one of her little, pink, bubble-gum whims being catered to. She had lessons in everything you could imagine. Singing, dancing, basket-weaving (just a guess)…her relatives owned the land on which King of Prussia Mall now stands. This was no poor bitch.
I also don’t like her because she’s a moron. If you are going to date Joe Jonas, you better take it for what it’s worth. This dude is at the foothill of mountains of male-whorism. He’s young, adorable, rich, and girls mail him their panties. Do you really think he’s going to settle down and date you for 6 years, a la Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens? I mean, she’s got nice hair and all, but her face bothers me. It’s too thin.
If you are going to date a male superslut, ie: Joe Jonas or John Mayer, you better ask somebody. You are not going to change them. They are just going to use you and throw you away for the next hot starlet. I want to smack anyone who dates John Mayer. He’s not that hot, and his head is the size of my torso. And he reminds me of someone who would have chronic halitosis.
So when I saw the covers of the magazines that she was devastated because Jake Gyllenhaal broke up with her, I wanted to vomit a little in my mouth. Jake is pretty hot. But he’s older and he’s rebounding from his breakup with Reese. I want to pull Taylor to the side, and say, “Look, I understand you thought you were going to have babies and get a picket fence with him, but for chrissakes, you’re 12 and he’s already got chest-hair! LOTS of it.” (I bet it flutters in the wind if your breath were to cross it while laying across his chest. Like a grassy meadow.)
I’m just sayin, the “little girl who keeps getting rejected by all of Hollywoods male celebrity” act needs to stop. I would have so much more respect for you if YOU would be the one to break a few hearts instead of always playing the victim.
And now I am going to go duct tape my mouth shut for wasting a post on Taylor Swift. I read about 30 magazines while I was away.