Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Once a Bride, Never a Bridesmaid.

I would like to think of myself as someone who has some pretty awesome friends. These are the kind of friends you end up at Bingo with when you are 80…old, blue-haired bitches wearing scarves around their pincurls. And our husbands all ignore our ridiculousness.

So you tell me why they don’t love me enough to let me be in their weddings?

After all, it’s all about ME. Lol.

You see all these movies that tell you that you are going to be in each other’s weddings and hate your dress, and it’s one big happy mess, but you remember it for the rest of your life.

I was a bridesmaid once…in ONE of my TWO sister’s weddings. It was very nice…my dress was halfway decent. My other sister didn’t have either one of her two sisters in her wedding. I am still upset about that, and it was like 6 years ago. I think she may realize the error of her ways, now that the friends she picked turned out to be fair-weathered.

Most of my closest friends were married before I knew them, OR they had small weddings, not having attendants, other than a sister.

My divorced/divorcing friends will probably not have another wedding if they get married. You just don’t see it often.

My best friend, I will call her “Sir”…got married in Vegas a few years ago. It was a lovely wedding, but low key, so she didn’t have traditional attendants. Only her sister and her husband’s best friend. Yes, I was disappointed, but I understood, given the location. I still carried out my Best Friend duties of helping where needed and planning the Bachelorette party, at which I am a master.

Now HER sister is getting married. She’s been like my little sister since I was 10. She’s also the last of the bunch, and she’s become one of my best friends over the years since she got too tall for me to terrorize.

And guess what?

I’m a bridesmaid, bitch.

Although, I think it’s out of guilt….and I’m okay with that.

She didn’t want a large bridal party either, mostly due to the men we all marry, don’t have a lot of dude friends to wear a monkey suit and stand up for them. But she realizes she needs my "expert" planning skills, and since we talked about it since we were young and she was one of my bridesmaids, it’s come full circle. In any case, I am very excited and honored to be a part of it.



  1. Oh yay!! Congrats on the bridesmaid duties! I was asked to be a bridesmaid to me BFF and said no. Its her 3rd wedding and she is doing it BIG. Again. I've already got 2 ugly dresses in the closet from her.

    I am still involved in everything. She is calling me her honorary Maid of Honor since her 14 yr old daughter is her maid of honor and doesn't have a clue!

    Enjoy it!

  2. How fun! I LOVE being a bridesmaid, I only did it once, for my cousin, and I'm doing it again in May for my brother's wife-to-be. Probably my last shot at being one, sadly :-( Have fun!!

  3. Oh how fun! My maid of honor got married 6 months before me and I wasn't invited to her wedding. LOL, funny how things like that work. I'm in a wedding in April and I tolerate the other girls in the bridal party but I can't say I'm a huge fan of all of them - but it's for my friend and it's an honor. The only one that was in my wedding that I can see being in theirs is my little sister's who is 8 and I'll be the one old lady up there if she has be stand up with her. You never know though, you may end up in another wedding of someone you haven't even met yet.

    Congrats on being a bridesmaid!

  4. I chose you for several reasons:

    1) You've been a great help at planning and researching.

    2) Pity/ Guilt.

    3) I realized that I don't care if the bridemaids and groomsmen equal out. You stand up there for a few minutes and then have fun at the reception. I've always hated the bridemaid/groomsman dance, it's ackward.

    4) Despite being taller than you, I still fear you.

    5) You are one of my best friends.

  5. I am also going to be a bridesmaid for the first time this summer.

    What's WITH that? Am I such a terrible friend no one wants me to be in their wedding? Do I have absolutely no real friends?

    Actually, I have the same prolem as you, most of my friends were already married and when I got married I was 19 and I moved away the next day, literally. So,never an ugly dress or awkward groomsman moment for me.

    So this summer, I got asked to stand up with another army wife who I don't know very well but who has no other friends here. So I win by default. Yay us!

  6. I have to say, I really enjoy your blog but I am a slight bit offended by this (i guess you expect this when you blog but I still feel like commenting!) I have not been a fair weathered friend to your sister. I have stood by her and supported her through everything even when i didnt totally agree!! Although I can say I still don't know why she didn't ask you to be in the wedding too...we would have had a lot of fun...

  7. Just get drunk and enjoy..b@tch!! You know if I ever redid it you would be standing right next to me all the!! Course not so sure if your hubby would agree...and I am going with Vals 2nd and last!!

  8. Val...I love the fact you put Pity as a reason. That's why I adore you.

    Alexis...Didn't mean to offend you or call you fair weathered....i was more driving home the fact I was deeply hurt (and still am) that she didnt ask me. I also talk out of my ass for amusement, so you must excuse the liberties I take. lol.

    Wendy, I know you would have me in your wedding, but you will never be remarried. You are so stuck with him.

  9. yay! I have been a bridesmaid 5 times and began getting teased at my previous job... then I met MY prince charming and flipped them ALL the bird ;) It's fun, sounds like you'll be a great one too, which are hard to come by, but I was lucky as my girls went above and beyond for me... I'm happy for you!