Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Moments of an Awkward Youth Part 3

 “I don’t know what was going through my mind at the time.” I can randomly apply this phrase to just about some event, every year of my life.
For me, 6th grade became the Ground Zero ashes from which the rest of my life rose. There could be no getting lower. There I was, with my butch hair and my stone-washed jeans with holes in the knees. Not exactly popularity material. Dressing was also not one of my strong-suits. It was very popular back then, to wear your sweatshirt inside out. But me, coming so close, yet so far away, wore a white Toys R Us sweatshirt to school, thinking I would look cool. Unfortunately, the “I’m a Toys R Us kid” phrase was clearly visable on the front side of the shirt, making me look nothing but ridiculous. (My best friends STILL TO THIS DAY BRING THIS UP.) I blame my mother, of course, for buying me the damn shirt in the first place.
I always wanted to be something more than what I was. I definitely had dreams of becoming famous, and as it turns out, the name “Keri” wasn’t going to cut it for me. And so I informed my best friend in a note, that I was changing my name to “TT” which was short for Tori. I have a need to stop here and explain that 90210 had just started, so I loved it. As I tried to pass it to her, our teacher intercepted it and not only did he read it to the class, make me write it on the chalkboard, but he also posted it in the hall on the bulletin board so the other kids could read it! This is how I KNOW that teachers are fully aware of bullying, and sometimes condone and begin it.
Another way I know, is because there were these 3 guys that were the cool guys and they called themselves, “The Brothers”. One of them used to tease my best friends and I mercilessly on the school bus. He used to stand in front of the teacher and punch me right in the face! There was also an incident in gym class that involved about 30 dodgeballs and the whole class, but I’m still sensitive about that.  Now I was a moron, and didn’t know how to fight back then, but I saw this douche bag at a friends wedding a few years ago, and it took all I could to not follow him in to the men’s room and kick his ass!!! But karma came around and took care of him in high school. He was ugly and no longer cool enough to be a “brother”, so he was left in obscurity where no one we graduated with probably even remembers he existed.
As it turned out, Keri turned out to be a completely appropriate name for a female celebrity, and that’s why I can’t to this day, watch a movie with Keri Russell in it. She stole my impending fame and she was a Mouseketeer, which was what I wanted to be more than anything. Fuck Felicity.

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  1. At least you can write about it all though. I had horrible hair, a short psuedo-pixie, a la Mollie Ringwald, but with a bleached 4 inch tail in honor of the Thompson Twins. Toss in a set of acrylic leg warmers for Flashdance and trainwreck doesn't even begin to desribe the horror. Blogging is a sweet salve to those days of pain.

  2. You certainly had you share of bad moments but seems you have turned out to be quite a gal. Sorry you had to endure that torment.

  3. Just keep remembering she cut all her hair off & everyone called her ugly... see? Even her life had its screwed up moments! :)

  4. A childhood this horrific has to be Atleast I can laugh about it now. I wasn't even cool enough for legwarmers. I was so happy when she cut off her hair to prove she was more than just pretty hair, and then no one wanted her in movies anymore!!! You are so right!!!!

  5. Hi! I stumbled upon your blog today :)
    I think we can all think of some childhood torment that we endured!
    Happy Wednesday!

  6. Keri--- just read your page on your son's aspergers/autism. My 17 year old son was diagnosed with PDD at age 2.5, then changed to aspergers. He had the same school story (@ a Christian school)as your son. At the beginning of 3rd grade, I brought all 3 kids home and began home educating. Home schooling will not set your son back. He will be able to bloom in what he excels at and you can work 1:1 on his more challenging subjects. I blog at and would love it if you stopped by for a visit. (I don't blog on my son's aspergers for the sheer reason he has gained control over a lot of the symptoms. Email me if you think I can help! ~ Ellen Oh, I'm your newest follower!

  7. i can so relate to this in a similar position while i was growing up. {i should blog about it}

    i too have wanted to be a mouseketeer, and famous {still do}.

    your newest follower!