Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Ultimate fajita dip= 1, Keri=0

Not working brings it's challenges...like avoiding eating a bunch of crap while I am home.

So far, it's not so easy.

I want to keep the fifty pounds I lost, off permanently, and maybe lose another 50. I've found that men don't appreciate heft in a woman, although if I were a man, I would certainly prefer snuggling up to something with a little squish to it.

I look at guys who body build, and am immediately disgusted by huge muscles. Don't get me wrong, I like tone and definition. But when I see a man with huge, veiny muscles, I find myself wanting to bite them. To see how long it would take to get them to say, "ouch!"

I also want to shower them, since they think coating themselves in baby oil makes them look tougher. I would imagine it as a weakness if they were to actually fight, being all greased up. If you are going to have muscles, you should be forced to cage fight, otherwise, it's really just a waste. We should also get to see their penises, because if you have a shriveled, steroid-shrunken penis, it makes any muscles null and void.

Anyway, yesterday, I made a delectable treat that I like to call "ultimate fajita dip", which consists of a bowl filled with one part guacamole, one container of sour cream, sauteed onions and peppers, and chicken cooked in taco seasoning. Then I scoop it up and eat it with multigrain tortilla chips.

It's just about the most happy moment of my life when I eat it.

Yes....happier than my wedding day AND the birth of my children, both put together. It's like what I would imagine heaven would consist of.

Then it's followed by guilt, shame, and self-loathing...similar to a one night stand, or so I'm told it should feel like. Funny that random sex shouldn't evoke those feelings in me, yet compulsive overeating does.

6 comments:

  1. I like how you eat the dip with multigrain tortilla chips. It's like ordering a diet coke at McDonalds.

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  2. Haha, I was just going to say that. Or like me, ordering the non-fat super skinny latte and then eating all the whipped cream off my hubby's drink :)

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  3. I have been known to buy a candy bar and a diet coke, but hey, every little bit helps! LOL

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  4. The multigrain chips were strictly chosen based on taste, not caloric value.

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  5. We can totally understand though because that dip sounds irresistable! : ).. Yummy. I am sure that we would all be right there with ya! I am sooo going to try it.

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  6. That sounds effing DELISH. It's all up my ally, but I prefer regular corn tortilla chips, I'm convinced I'm addicted to anything corn related, especially chips and tortillas. And for the record, you're human... I feel guilty when I over indulge as well, buuuut it happens and it feels damn good at the time. You'll keep the weight off, forgive yourself and move on!

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