So, since I DVR everything, I am watching Anderson Cooper's daytime talk show from yesterday.
(Yes, I AM up early! I woke up at 6 and have been up ever since.)
So, this show is about who works harder, and blah, blah blah.
Whoa! Ladies...I've done it both ways, and there is no way to make the argument for one over the other.
First, it largely depends on the age of your kids. My kids are 11 and 13, so with me staying home right now, it's not even comparable to when they were 1 and 3. I can go back to sleep now, have plenty of time to get my duties done, and I am recouperating.
From what, you ask? The first 13 years of motherhood!!! I've been tired since the minute I peed on that stick!
But when I work fulltime, I am exhausted by the time I get home, have the housework to get done, help kids with homework, cook something edible, and it's busy. I have done this since 2003, and largely with my husband gone...so, as a single parent...but when my husband IS home, it's a completely different experience. My husband does housework, and when he's home, all the laundry.
Both sides have equal responsibility. If you stay home when your kids are little, GOD BlESS you, because it takes a calling. Seriously. I don't know how many times you can clean up the same mess in one day and keep your sanity. You are making a sacrifice to stay home, FOR YOUR KIDS. It takes dedication and love to never be away from them.
At least when I work outside the home, I feel that I am getting a break from my wife/mom side, and can feel like I am still able to hold an intellectual conversation. I had brain rot from listening to Barney. I had five minutes to myself when I worked. I actually worked less at work than when I had toddlers and stayed home!
I just think that whether you stay at home, work outside the home, or are blessed enough to have the choice, then instead of arguing who has it harder, why not support each other and leave it at that? We have enough bullshit to deal with in our relationships, asshole bosses, and tantrum prone children, so let's give each other a break and an 'atta girl.