Real Housewives of the Military???

I made the mistake of watching "The Real Housewives of NY" last night, since Grey's Anatomy was running reruns AGAIN. Why do I pay for cable? Seriously...there is not a damn thing on other than HGTV.

I am so sick of watching reruns. I used to think Real Housewives was appropriately amusing. But they've screwed it up so bad that I am finding myself so bored that I actually go to bed early and just turn it off in the middle of episodes. I did that Sunday night, during RH of Orange County too.

I wonder what Real Housewives would be like if they did a "Military" version? This would be the likely cast of characters:

You could have the straitlaced FRG leader, in all her cookie-baking glory who is always ready to talk about how great her husband "The Capt" is. This woman lives and breathes military and even puts bumper stickers on her car and wears lapel pins to prove it.

You could have the nice girl next door, who has a great sense of humor and you almost think you would be friends, but then her husband won't let her leave the house and their 4 kids. This is the girl who, during a deployment, has to keep the webcam signed online at all times so he can monitor her every move from overseas. (I wish I was kidding that I knew of someone like this.)

You have the cheating wife/cheating husband scenario, where one of them is always accusing the other of cheating on each other. They are getting divorced every other week. Then during deployments, he says he is going to leave her for another woman, so she gets herself pregnant on R&R to suck him back in.

There is the college student wife, who doesn't have kids yet and is SUPER in love with her husband but fiercely determined to not have kids before she gets college done so she can prove her parents wrong when they complained she was never going to get her education if she married a soldier. This poor young thing is still jaded about the military because she only has herself to worry about. Deployment is a different beast when you have kids that you can't get a break from.

There is also the awesome couple, who you and your husband both get along with, and you think, "okay, what's wrong with these people, because they are too good to be true." And then they proposition you because they are swingers, and divulge this information out in the open at get togethers.

And then there is the military wives like me...I work full time, (although you could be a full time mom) I keep a clean house. I love my kids but occasionally make them shovel dog shit. I love my husband, and will occasionally wear some patriotic display of affection because I am proud of his service. I enjoy my time with my friends, and I have goals that I want to accomplish for my life, so that when my husband is gone, I have something to get me out of bed and out of misery. I also like to be in charge, so I would most likely argue with the prissy, FRG leader. Not to be in charge of the FRG, I am just a little bit of a control freak and I know more than they do. haha.

I also think they should do a spin-off series, "The RH of Detroit". Now THAT would be interesting to see.

My advice, stop trying to find women to be on these shows that are vapid and have such social insecurities that they can't even have a group of friends because they are always trying to "one up" each other. Stop choosing them for looks, although, many of them are in their 40s. Why don't you choose some younger women too. How about a few that haven't eaten 4 husbands for dinner already and been pumped full of botox and collagen? Choose women who actually do more than arrange benefit dinners for the sole purpose of showing how charitable they are. And pick people who are not psuedo-celebrity-wannabes. Larsa Pippen? Kyle Richards? Camille Grammer? There is nothing "Real" about them.

Andy Cohen, get these Yentas out and get some real chicks. Let's freshen things up or the series will die a final death.